Building Self Esteem And Self Confidence

Is your "Comfort Zone" holding you back?

What exactly is the 'comfort zone'? And is it a useful concept?

The comfort zone is a term invented to help explain our tendency to fall into habitual ways of acting. I'm sure you all know of habits you tend to have conscious awareness of ... such as the side of your head or ear you prefer to use the phone ... or the order with which you like to do things when you get up in the mornings.

Of course there are many many habits we have ... with good reason!

Anyone building self esteem must learn to recognize
and change limiting habits!

Why? ... Because almost everything we do is based on habit!

Yes, it is widely believed that our 'unconscious mind' (or 'programming') is responsible for around 90% of our daily behaviors. And by their very nature, we are usually unaware of these routines, patterns and habitual actions.

Mostly this is a good thing! For one, it removes the need to constantly think about the mundane actions we must do. It also keeps us safe by automating tasks - such as crossing the road (a learned skill of course!)

So when is it not a good thing?

When your habitual response limits your ability to get a particular outcome ... such as building self esteem.

This habitual - and learned - response, has either a powerful positive or negative effect on self esteem and self confidence. But more about that later ...

If every time I go to ask someone for a salary raise for example, I find I am going knock-kneed and shaky, this is simply a preprogrammed habitual response I must find a way to shift.

"But Robert", you say fretfully, "It's not just the knocked-knees and shakiness - you don't know what is going on inside my head!"

And that too is simply habit.

But let's go back to your comfort zone. Your habits.

Ever tried doing something 'out of habit' like those tricks where one tries to cross one's arms the 'other' way? Or use the phone on the other ear? It's weird and uncomfortable isn't it?

Hold on a minute - there's that word comfort creeping in again.

When you first begin to change deeply ingrained habits it will feel uncomfortable!

Just think about it like learning any new skill:

• How were you when you first started with computers?
• Or using the Internet?

So when we talk about 'the comfort zone' it is simply a way of understanding where our habits currently lie ... and where we need to develop more useful ones.

And being outside your comfort zone is simply to be in a space where your old habits are unsupportive ... or you are learning new ones ... and it is not going to feel normal.

However, going radically outside your comfort zone might hurt! (In fact some serial thrill-seekers actually thrive on this.)

So we need a way to make going outside of the comfort zone ... developing supportive self esteem and self confidence habits ... that are easy to learn, that let you grow at your preferred pace and in your own style.

Fortunately this is quite achievable - though the detailed techniques are perhaps not well known.

Why not bookmark this page, because coming soon are these articles, tools and cutting edge techniques to help you in your path to building self esteem:

• Using the self help success spiral to guarantee success!
• Are you frightened of fear itself?
• Let go of failure - confident people live with it too!
• Know your Conscious and Unconscious 'pay offs'
• Chunk for success - make every step achievable
• Use your strengths, work on your weaknesses
• Get to know your success: Define your outcome(s) and 'evidence procedure'
• Tap into the power of self esteem and self confidence affirmations
• Using modeling to be confident when you don't feel it
• Anchoring: How to get instant self esteem!
• Take action: Learn to script, plan and build up your momentum

Still looking for more? ...

Read this article about low self esteem ...

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